I joined the gym 2 weeks ago and I'm still on a roll.
"Gym Guy" wanted me to commit to at least 4 days per week and was persistent to the point of annoyance with his constant "when are you coming back?" and "what time tomorrow will you be here?" - I'm guessing he took one look at me and thought "ok, fat girl, maybe if I ask for 4 days you'll give me at least 2".
Haha Gym Guy - I've been doing 6 days per week!!! Neener neener neener!!!
I'm still dripping with sweat by the end of my workouts, but they're getting a little easier each day.
Now comes the part where I get anxious to see results.
I know that it will take time, but damn it, I want to look different now!!!
Not to mention the fact that I have to fly to Las Vegas and California in less than one month and I'm already stressing about whether I'll be able to fit in a seat on the plane.
Exactly how much weight can I expect to lose in a month? Is it likely that all my weight loss over the next month could be confined to my rear end?
My mind is full of terrible scenarios wherein I'm asked to purchase a second seat to accommodate my ass or I manage to wedge myself into my seat but need the jaws of life to get me out at the end of the flight.
I want to be able to board a plane (for the first time in several years) without feeling like I'm "that girl" that everyone is secretly praying that they're not seated next to. I want to be able to fly cross country without having bruises on my hips from squeezing myself between the arm rests. I want to not ponder whether I can afford to triple my travel budget to purchase a first class seat, because I'm fairly confident that I'd have wiggle room in one of those!!!
In any case, I'm sure I'll be stressing that one until my ass (and the rest of me) is safely on board and settled (comfortably, I hope) into one seat.
For now, I'm just going to keep plugging along, waiting for the day when I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror at the gym and don't want to run screaming for a tiny dark room with no reflective surfaces!!!
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
The Roll
I joined the gym last Monday.
I went to the gym to work out on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and today!
Yes folks, we call that being on a roll!
I'm actually loving the circuit training that "Gym Guy" has me doing. Treadmill for 10 minutes, then weights, treadmill, weights, treadmill, then weights again, and finally treadmill. Honestly, I'm still just thanking my lucky stars that he didn't put me on the medieval torture device otherwise known as the elliptical machine.
Now that I'm actually ON the roll, I need to make sure that I stay that way!
Gym Guy seemed genuinely proud of me when I told him how I've been doing - especially impressed that I'd increased my treadmill speed as well as the weights on 2 of my machines.
I was temporarily deflated when he made a face after I told him I was only down a pound, but I was quickly re-inflated when he realized that I've only been doing this for a week.
I am to weigh in next week and report back to him - Gym Guy remains confident that I can cut my body weight in half!
I'm not stressing over that just yet - right now I'm just anticipating the first "wow, have you lost weight?" comment....
I went to the gym to work out on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and today!
Yes folks, we call that being on a roll!
I'm actually loving the circuit training that "Gym Guy" has me doing. Treadmill for 10 minutes, then weights, treadmill, weights, treadmill, then weights again, and finally treadmill. Honestly, I'm still just thanking my lucky stars that he didn't put me on the medieval torture device otherwise known as the elliptical machine.
Now that I'm actually ON the roll, I need to make sure that I stay that way!
Gym Guy seemed genuinely proud of me when I told him how I've been doing - especially impressed that I'd increased my treadmill speed as well as the weights on 2 of my machines.
I was temporarily deflated when he made a face after I told him I was only down a pound, but I was quickly re-inflated when he realized that I've only been doing this for a week.
I am to weigh in next week and report back to him - Gym Guy remains confident that I can cut my body weight in half!
I'm not stressing over that just yet - right now I'm just anticipating the first "wow, have you lost weight?" comment....
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
My Goals
This week, we bit the bullet - we joined a gym.
It's a small one that just opened up about 2 minutes from our apartment but has multiple locations (one of which happens to be right next door to my office).
So, we walk in and speak to the trainer who is also the owner (who will now be referred to as "Fitness Guy").
As I'm filling out the paperwork, Fitness Guy turns to Ben and says "So, what are your fitness goals?"
Ben, being the smooth talker that he is simply says "I don't have any". Doh!
Fitness Guy: "Did your wife drag you here?"
Ben: "Yep." Again...Doh!
Fitness Guy (to me): "Since you're obviously the one in charge, what are YOUR fitness goals?"
I'm sure I had some witty response (which I can't remember) - but that question really got me thinking. What ARE my fitness goals?
Here's what I've come up with:
- I want to ride in an airplane without having a panic attack about fitting in the seat or needing a seat belt extension.
-I want to wear a smaller t-shirt size than my husband.
-I want to walk the dog without being out of breath.
-I want to climb a flight of stairs without worrying that I'm going to have a heart attack and keel over and forever be remembered as "that fat girl whose heart exploded because she climbed a flight of stairs".
-I want to go shopping and not immediately flip to the back of the clothing rack where the biggest sizes are.
-I want to spend a single day not worrying about how fat I look and feel.
-I want to laugh without everything jiggling.
-I want to go to a restaurant without worrying about whether I can fit into the booth without my stomach touching the table or my boobs resting on top of the table.
-As Kevin Spacey put it in American Beauty - "I want to look good naked".
Today I had my first training session with Fitness Guy. We'll see if any of these goals are actually attainable...
P.S. My boss and I have made a pact - as soon as we both lose 10 pounds, we're treating ourselves to pedicures!!!
It's a small one that just opened up about 2 minutes from our apartment but has multiple locations (one of which happens to be right next door to my office).
So, we walk in and speak to the trainer who is also the owner (who will now be referred to as "Fitness Guy").
As I'm filling out the paperwork, Fitness Guy turns to Ben and says "So, what are your fitness goals?"
Ben, being the smooth talker that he is simply says "I don't have any". Doh!
Fitness Guy: "Did your wife drag you here?"
Ben: "Yep." Again...Doh!
Fitness Guy (to me): "Since you're obviously the one in charge, what are YOUR fitness goals?"
I'm sure I had some witty response (which I can't remember) - but that question really got me thinking. What ARE my fitness goals?
Here's what I've come up with:
- I want to ride in an airplane without having a panic attack about fitting in the seat or needing a seat belt extension.
-I want to wear a smaller t-shirt size than my husband.
-I want to walk the dog without being out of breath.
-I want to climb a flight of stairs without worrying that I'm going to have a heart attack and keel over and forever be remembered as "that fat girl whose heart exploded because she climbed a flight of stairs".
-I want to go shopping and not immediately flip to the back of the clothing rack where the biggest sizes are.
-I want to spend a single day not worrying about how fat I look and feel.
-I want to laugh without everything jiggling.
-I want to go to a restaurant without worrying about whether I can fit into the booth without my stomach touching the table or my boobs resting on top of the table.
-As Kevin Spacey put it in American Beauty - "I want to look good naked".
Today I had my first training session with Fitness Guy. We'll see if any of these goals are actually attainable...
P.S. My boss and I have made a pact - as soon as we both lose 10 pounds, we're treating ourselves to pedicures!!!
Thursday, March 15, 2012
1 Month To Go
When I began this blog last year, I was hoping to lose 50 pounds by my birthday. (Insert naive optimism here)
Well, I've got exactly 1 month to go and about...48 pounds still to lose.
It's been a bit of a roller coaster, and while I haven't come anywhere near my weight loss goal, I have discovered some things about myself, about my frustrations with food, and about my bad habits.
I know I didn't gain weight overnight, so I can't expect to lose weight overnight - no matter how much I long for a "magic pill" solution.
Even though I'm still struggling, I'll choose to look on the bright side - at least I haven't gained any additional weight!
I'm also sticking to my fast for Lent - no ice cream or pop until Easter!!!
Well, I've got exactly 1 month to go and about...48 pounds still to lose.
It's been a bit of a roller coaster, and while I haven't come anywhere near my weight loss goal, I have discovered some things about myself, about my frustrations with food, and about my bad habits.
I know I didn't gain weight overnight, so I can't expect to lose weight overnight - no matter how much I long for a "magic pill" solution.
Even though I'm still struggling, I'll choose to look on the bright side - at least I haven't gained any additional weight!
I'm also sticking to my fast for Lent - no ice cream or pop until Easter!!!
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Progress
Over a week ago, I gave up ice cream and pop.
While I didn't expect the pop to be much of a challenge, I was terrified that I'd not only miss the ice cream, but also replace it with something else.
I'm proud to say, after 10 days, I'm not only not missing the ice cream, but I have managed not to replace it with M&M's, cookies, brownies...you get the idea.
In addition to making strides as far as my eating habits, I'm also back on the horse, or rather, the bike!
I was doing really well, then got out of my routine. But, now I'm back!
I'm coming back slowly - I was beginning to irritate my foot and my knees by doing the bike every day, so this time I'm going to pace myself a little more and hopefully avoid all that.
For a few weeks now, I've been toying with the idea of joining a gym and enlisting the help of a trainer - I'm wondering if that will help keep me on track.
Unfortunately, that's just not in our budget right now, so I'm going to have to keep myself motivated and energized.
While I didn't expect the pop to be much of a challenge, I was terrified that I'd not only miss the ice cream, but also replace it with something else.
I'm proud to say, after 10 days, I'm not only not missing the ice cream, but I have managed not to replace it with M&M's, cookies, brownies...you get the idea.
In addition to making strides as far as my eating habits, I'm also back on the horse, or rather, the bike!
I was doing really well, then got out of my routine. But, now I'm back!
I'm coming back slowly - I was beginning to irritate my foot and my knees by doing the bike every day, so this time I'm going to pace myself a little more and hopefully avoid all that.
For a few weeks now, I've been toying with the idea of joining a gym and enlisting the help of a trainer - I'm wondering if that will help keep me on track.
Unfortunately, that's just not in our budget right now, so I'm going to have to keep myself motivated and energized.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Days 1 and 2
Lent has arrived...which means that it's time to give up one of my favorite things...ice cream.
Boo =(
Actually, this year, I'm getting a two-fer.
After I informed Ben that WE would be giving up ice cream, WE (and by that I mean "I") decided that WE should also give up pop.
Well...we've survived Day 1 and Day 2 - I haven't had any major cravings for ice cream, and Ben has had more water in the last 2 days than he's had in the last 2 months!
The trick is going to be not replacing ice cream with something else...for example...seasonal M&Ms...
Boo =(
Actually, this year, I'm getting a two-fer.
After I informed Ben that WE would be giving up ice cream, WE (and by that I mean "I") decided that WE should also give up pop.
Well...we've survived Day 1 and Day 2 - I haven't had any major cravings for ice cream, and Ben has had more water in the last 2 days than he's had in the last 2 months!
The trick is going to be not replacing ice cream with something else...for example...seasonal M&Ms...
Monday, February 20, 2012
16 Minutes
Today, while browsing the Yahoo headlines, I came across an intriguing story. A 16 minute workout!
Of course, me being me, I clicked onto it. Poor, gullible me. Thinking that there would actually be a workout that I could do in only 16 minutes and still see results. It's just the sort of magical solution that people like me pray for.
I soon realized that it was 8 "magic moves" from Jillian Michaels.
Ok, I'll come out with it - I DON'T LIKE JILLIAN MICHAELS!!!
I think she's smug, condescending, and looks down on everyone who isn't a size 4 and in the best shape of their life.
That said, I continued to scroll through the article, hoping that somehow this magical 16 minute workout included sitting on the couch, or simply walking in place.
No such luck.
It was a series of 8 exercises designed to help you tone twice as much in half the time. And, best of all, there were pictures showing how the exercises were supposed to look.
Now, I know that I'm not even close to being in shape, but I almost had a stroke just looking at the picture of some skinny-ass woman going from being on all 4's to having her legs kicked up above her head (picture how a donkey kicks).
Yeah right!
And it only got better from there - high kicks, a psychotic modified push-up, and something terrifying called "dragging dog" which required pulling yourself along the ground from a flat laying position into an "upward dog" yoga pose using just the palms of your hands and your toes - hahaha.
Exercise plans like that are a great idea...if you weigh 125 pounds and are already in shape.
But for someone like me, it makes me want to cry...or scream...or smack the "fitness guru" who came up with that routine from hell right in the face.
I think I'll stick with my low impact exercises - while secretly chastising myself for not being in shape enough to pull off even one of those maneuvers without having a heart attack.
Of course, me being me, I clicked onto it. Poor, gullible me. Thinking that there would actually be a workout that I could do in only 16 minutes and still see results. It's just the sort of magical solution that people like me pray for.
I soon realized that it was 8 "magic moves" from Jillian Michaels.
Ok, I'll come out with it - I DON'T LIKE JILLIAN MICHAELS!!!
I think she's smug, condescending, and looks down on everyone who isn't a size 4 and in the best shape of their life.
That said, I continued to scroll through the article, hoping that somehow this magical 16 minute workout included sitting on the couch, or simply walking in place.
No such luck.
It was a series of 8 exercises designed to help you tone twice as much in half the time. And, best of all, there were pictures showing how the exercises were supposed to look.
Now, I know that I'm not even close to being in shape, but I almost had a stroke just looking at the picture of some skinny-ass woman going from being on all 4's to having her legs kicked up above her head (picture how a donkey kicks).
Yeah right!
And it only got better from there - high kicks, a psychotic modified push-up, and something terrifying called "dragging dog" which required pulling yourself along the ground from a flat laying position into an "upward dog" yoga pose using just the palms of your hands and your toes - hahaha.
Exercise plans like that are a great idea...if you weigh 125 pounds and are already in shape.
But for someone like me, it makes me want to cry...or scream...or smack the "fitness guru" who came up with that routine from hell right in the face.
I think I'll stick with my low impact exercises - while secretly chastising myself for not being in shape enough to pull off even one of those maneuvers without having a heart attack.
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