Exercising: Plus Size Style

One of the biggest problems I have found during my journey to a skinnier (less fat) me, is the exercising.  

Aside from the process of actually mustering the motivation to get off my lazy keester and do something, I find that the act of exercising is the challenge.  

I would love nothing more than to go to a weekly Step class, or aerobics, or heaven forbid...Zumba!  Time and cost not being factors, I would love to have something that I enjoyed that I could go out and do, preferably on my way home from work 2 nights per week.

But...I'm too self conscious!  

Several years ago, when I lived in Columbus, I went with my neighbor to her Spin class.  Now, keep in mind, this was about 5 years and at least 75 pounds ago.  

It was the worst hour of my life.  I was humiliated!  My ass didn't fit on the seat of the bike, I was sweating like a pig, and I was so sore that I could barely walk to the car after class - meanwhile, tiny stick insect girls were happily bouncing up and down on their bikes, complete with flawless make up and a noticeable lack of sweat.

It's not a coordination thing.  I played sports, I took dance classes - I'm pretty sure I can rhythmically step from side to side while moving my arms around. 

It's the fact that group fitness classes are seldom geared towards those of us who live at the plus sized end of the spectrum.  We're unceremoniously thrust into a class with women who are "trying to get back to a size 2".  Um...I'm trying to get my size into the low double digits! 

That's what someone needs to come up with - a class specifically for folks with too much junk in the trunk.  They'd make a fortune!  And, no, Richard Simmons and "Sweatin' to the Oldies" doesn't count...although....

Here's what I want:

Low impact
All-inclusive workout (strength, flexibility, cardio)
Does not require moves that my extra baggage will not allow (low lunges, crunches, jumping jacks - nobody wants to see this bouncing around)
Minimum weight requirement of 200 pounds.  

And none of this "all fitness levels are welcome" bullshit!  Instead, it needs to read "suitable for those who will sweat like a pig, will be tired and ready for a break 10 minutes in, and may require the use of an oxygen mask following class".

Now, THAT'S a class that I'd pay money for!  

Until it exists, I think I'm stuck with needing to lose weight before I sign up for a class to help me lose more weight - there's something very wrong with that...